Followers forgive me for I have sinned, this is my confession, and this was my binge…
Sweet baby Jesus, I don’t know what happened!!! Right after 12 in 12 ended, I started eating Flexitarian just as I announced. Then the holiday treats started to appear. I wasn’t too freaked out at first, as my plan allows up to two desserts per week, but by Day 4 into my new program, I exceeded my allotment.
Not to worry, I thought – I just won’t have any desserts next week. That’s the last thing I remember saying to myself before the Food Sirens, One-Bite and It’s-Okay, made a return appearance, this time bringing their distant cousin, Tis-The-Season with them. They assured me that I’d get back on the bandwagon quicker after having toned and sculpted my willpower muscle during my experiment last year.
Ho ho holy moly, is that 201.2 on the scale? I CROSSED THE LINE!!!! I CROSSED THE BLOODY LINE! How the heck did I gain 6 lbs. in a month? Grenades and accusations started going off in my head! What have you done, Mare? You’re nothing but a big, fat, calorie-counting-evangelist phoney, who doesn’t practice what you preach!
I wasn’t going to weigh myself this morning – I wanted the weekend to work off some of the sugar and flush out last night’s high in sodium sushi, but my new year’s resolution is to OWN IT, RETHINK IT, and ultimately RELEASE IT*.
I know how this happened, but I’m trying to understand why. My best guess is that I became a “Runaway Ringo”.
When I was a kid, the man down the street had a dog named, Ringo who he didn’t allow in the house. He kept the poor beagle in the garage during the winter months, and locked up in the backyard the rest of the year. He never walked the portly pooch, and only fed him table scraps, primarily pasta and bread. You’d think the story couldn’t get any worse, right? Wrong. Multiply it by six. It seemed every year or so, the man would replace fat Ringo with a new playful beagle pup, who he also named Ringo. When we asked him what happened to old Ringo, he replied he ran away when the gate was “accidentally” left open.
OWNING IT: I left the diet gate open, and the moment I thought I was “free”, I took off like a Runaway Ringo and stuffed my face at the all-you-can-buffet that was the Christmas season. Santa didn’t force feed me, I did.
RETHINKING IT: It’s obvious I have to tweak my new plan as I can’t be trusted around sugar yet (or ever). The trouble with allowing a food addict two desserts a week is that two becomes four, four becomes eight, and before you know it, you’re knee deep in sugar filled Tribbles. Giving up sugar might be drastic, but it’s a boundary I must stay within.
RELEASING IT: Tomorrow is a new day and I get to start over.
If you also find you’re a Runaway Ringo in an area in your life, I’ve enclosed a link to Andy Stanley’s four-part sermon entitled, Starting Over, where he gives you practical tips on how to own, rethink, and release whatever you’re wrestling with.
To view my hideous monthly results, click here.
To view a message from the slimmed down, sexy Santa who can teach us all a thing or two about dieting, click the video below….